you had my heart, now i want it back, i'm starting to see everything you lack

there are just certain times where i should know better. yet i still keep giving in and it only gets me in trouble. well not really trouble, but it only makes this more annoying and frustrating. and i bring it on myself. i really should just stop. drop all communication and be done with it. part of me just really wants to hit myself for being so ridiculous about this whole thing and part of me just wants things to go back to the way they were before. and a small part of me is just yelling at myself and telling to stop being a wimp about everything and just be brutally honest with not only myself but you as well. then i wouldn't feel like such a fool. bah.

some people have the worst timing ever. seriously. i was doing perfectly fine and then you had to go and pull that wonderful stunt saturday night. way to take the doucheness to a whole new level... or how about a few levels up. that sounds about right. i thought you were a jerk before, but now you really have shown your true colors. and basically you are an ass, who i hope gets what they has coming to them. and soon.

rant over. granted i did get very good blackmail out of saturday. that i intend on using if there ever comes a time in which i have to. :) oh the ideas that are running through not only mine but the roooooooommates head. i can just see it now.

i stilllll have not unpacked from my trip to washington last week. unpacking is like packing. only worse i think. maybe their even. either way i am avoiding it. more so because i believe i will be back in washington next week for most of the week anyway. i honestly feel more relaxed and stress free when i am there. i am more able to take my mind off of things. and clearly i need it. or will. or whatever.

tomorrow is tuesday. which i am sort of dreading. like always. but i am going in tomorrow with a smile on my face and a positive attitude. my coteacher and i decided that we are going to tell each other that it's going to be a great day everyday. cheesy i know, but whatever works to get us through the long and crazy busy days.

off to pack stuff up for tomorrow and then completely crash. i dislike that fact that it's only monday and i am this tired.