I wish i was cold as stone, then i wouldn't feel a thing

so it's official... i have applied to grad school. 2 actually. 

here's a timeline of what made me come to this decision: 

july/august: i got another "birthday email" from TSPC (i have gotten this same email since i became a licensed teacher in the state of oregon) informing me that i have until my birthday of 2012 to meet the requirements to renew my teaching license. after looking at the requirements, in order to renew my current Initial 1 Teaching License from the State of Oregon; i am required to have at least 3 semester hours towards my master's degree. i have known this information since i first received my license back in 2009, but have put it off (procrastination at it's finest) until now. it wasn't so much procrastination, but money. after finishing undergrad, i was in debt too much already and didn't want to jump right into grad school until i knew i was ready. 


beginning of august: major panic attack about what i was going to do about this. i only had 1 year left basically till things had to be done and i was worried since i am here in south korea. i then refused to think about it before/during my 2 week vacation in thailand. i told myself to put it out of my mind till after i came back from vacation. i didn't want to be stressed about it while on vacation. 


september: returned from vacation... still not wanting to think about it, but forcing myself to. so began the research of where i wanted to look at going. at one point i had 8 different tabs open on my laptop of different schools. 
one of the requirements that i wanted was that they have an online program. i was hoping to start my classes while i was still over here in korea. and then if i moved back to the states and decided that i might want to take classes on the campus i could have that option. (though i don't know if that would actually happen) 
after plenty of research, a few freak out moments, some stress induced tears, i have narrowed my choices down to 2. grand canyon university out of arizona and ashford university out of iowa. (i have a few friends who are currently doing their master's degree's at each school and they have all said they enjoy it) so i decided to apply to both programs to see what happens.


currently: as of now i have applied to both and now have to do my FAFSA... oh fafsa how i hate you. i need to narrow it down and pick one school so i can move forward and get started. i'm not entirely sure how i really feel about all of this, but i know it's the right step. (plus i don't think i can put it off much longer) 


the next big decision i am going to have to make is what i am going to do come next march. stay in korea, go somewhere else and teach, go back to the states, if i got back to the states; where to go. and of course the job aspect. and a car. which would require me to get my driver's license renewed since it expired on my birthday in august. so many things to think about...